Sound Unknown

If everything is below me
Then why is everything so loud?
I’m in this for myself
But i put everyone in front of me
It’s like I take steps forward
But I’m always in back
All the time

When do things truly go your way when you make everyone get their way
It’s all loud and there’s sound but there’s nothing worth hearing
When I put myself in the front
I mess it up thinking whether I hit the right note or the nerve
The voices in pity telling me i did good but i know the truth

I can’t even tell you what the faces were like
It doesn’t even matter
Colorful masks with twisted, morphed faces see through me
Because I’m a glass home
You’re allowed to throw stones

I’ll never be good enough for things I love
Because they break too

My sound is unknown
My smile is wide like a clown
My speaking voice is loud and telling the truth until it drowns
Until it drowns out by the sound
That no one wants to hear